Interviewer. Do you think it should continue like this? Participant: It should continue to be like this. . . things are changing and in some cases the female can make decisions as well, but very few cases. Across the interviews, male and female respondents expressed the sense that their society is male-driven and that men make the decisions in relationships and in families. These patriarchal family structures were not only evident throughout the interviews, but they were also mentioned in informal dialogues carried out with key informants: men bring income into the family while the women’s responsibility revolves around activities carried out in the home, the most important being supporting the husband and the children. Childcare appears to take precedence, with one participant stating that often husbands feel neglected in Albanian society because once the couple has a child, the woman must devote her attention to the baby and thereby ignore many of the husband’s needs. In response to various probes regarding a male-driven society, two participants revealed that when a child is born many families celebrate the birth of a boy. This baby boy will carry on the family surname and continue the blood and honor of the family (an important cultural value as illustrated by the family feuds that take place in some regions). When asked about gender relations in Albania one of the male participants stated that there is a saying, “when a man is born, there is a big celebration in the house and when a female is born, it is seen as something inferior.” Some respondents stated that at least one boy is desired by most couples, hopefully as a first born. Males may be prized as first-borns not only because they inherit surnames but because of the decision-making power and responsibilities they assume. In response to a question about why men are always prioritized, one female respondent stated: Because Albanian society has always idealized men in the family . . . That’s why I say that it has been men, the one that has made the decisions, even for contraceptive methods. When asked about why society is the way it is, some participants reported that patriarchal social norms are passed on to the children. Some respondents report that certain men have more modern/western views of gender equality that depart from what they term this ‘old mentality’. However, these views are not shared by all and many are of the opinion that there is no attempt to change the ‘old mentality.’ Participant: Female ...
Interviewer. In Albania it has always been like this?
Interviewer. What if it was someone who wasn’t a close friend and they just came up— Xxxxxxx:--I’d be like what the fuck are you doing? Hey bitch, like, what? […] Xxxxx:--I think they’re trying to be really intimate, and like try to be friends with you or trying to be in with your friends and you’re just not having it. Xxxxxxx:--yeah. According to the comments, the reported use of bitch as an address represents a deeper level of friendship. Additionally, each group made it known that such level of friendship that could engage the use of bitch in a positive way was between female friends. However, if bitch was used between men, it was considered derogatory or emasculating. Further, though each woman mentioned some specific groups that used or did not use bitch or slut (African Americans, Asian Americans, etc.), the groups agreed that the use was not exclusive to these groups or sororities, though sororities offered a social outlet that was conducive to such “fun, superficial” language. Xxxxx, from the second group, explained it well when she said: #2 Xxxxx: The interesting thing I think about Greek life is when you enter a chapter room or go to a function, for some reason I feel like the tone of conversation just like doesn’t it like stops at this level, we’re not going to talk about anything really deep, nothing too emotional unless it’s gossip, we’re just going to talk about friendly things or funny things or unless it’s like your really close friend but it’s not a place where like it’s more fun, let’s not be too serious. So, that’s maybe when people at least in my sorority, all gather together and we’re able to use that language because it’s fun, it’s friendly, it implies like, like this is my fun time, [...] Something about Greek life, maybe sometimes for some people I feel like it brings out the superficiality. It implies that it’s just about friends. Many of the participants also reported that the use of bitch positively among friends is a college trend. Age, around college age or younger, was commonly cited as a factor to use bitch, which will be further elaborated on in the discussion. Otherwise, the use of bitch is referred to as cursing. Such conversation in terms of cursing was noted by Xxxxxxx, from group #3, who referred to using bitch in terms of an expletive during this explanation. #3 Xxxxxxx: I think it’s probably, I mean because I think the reason you don’t use the word bitch around people you don’t know is because it’s not a nice word. [...]
Interviewer. If you suspected one of your daughters was being hit by her partner how would you feel or what would you do? Xxxxxx: If one already has a partner or is married, they are together. There’s nothing more in my power to do. Obviously it would hurt me, but there’s nothing I can do. (Xxxxxx: 74- 95) Violence has also taken a toll on many relationships, and participants say that the prevalence of separation and divorce is an effect of violence in the community. In some cases, men suggested that couples end their relationships because of violence. One participant shared his story of separating from his wife in order to protect themselves and their children. Interviewer: At a community level, how do you think violence can be reduced or prevented?
Interviewer. Do you all think there’s a certain age that you should start talking about it [sex]? Xxxxxxx: I still want to know! (Xxxxxxx: 68-69) All respondents were asked how much communication they had or planned to have with their children regarding sex and sexual health. Many of them responded that their communication had been limited, but that they did know if their children were or were not yet sexually active. Several fathers mentioned that their son or daughter had a boyfriend or girlfriend, which they took to mean that he or she was sexually active. Those who did not think their children had yet had sex explained that he or she had not yet been in a relationship or that his children were too young to have had sex. Interviewer: Do you know if any of your kids have had sexual relations? Xxxxxxx: Yes, the oldest has. Interviewer: How did you react when you found out? Xxxxxxx: The truth is, his mother and I started to wonder and so we talked to him about it. We talked about it really well and he told his. From there, we started to ask him about it and if he was protecting himself, all of that. He told us too and everything is ok. Up until now, he has no STIs or anything, thank God. (Xxxxxxx: 60-63) Very few fathers said that they talked to their children about sex. Those who did typically only did so with their sons, not with daughters. Men mentioned the sense of friendship they had with their sons, and said that men more closely relate with their sons and mothers with their daughters. The idea of friendship between a parent and child in talking about sex was very important in forming a trusting and open relationship. This sort of friendly environment was the most conducive to discussions about sex from the fathers’ perspectives. Additionally, many of the men spoke of feeling awkward or embarrassed to talk to their children about sex. This feeling was mostly expressed in relation to talking with daughters, and shows a cross-gender communication barrier.
Interviewer. Do you talk with them about how they have to and how to take care of themselves if they start having sex? Xxxxxx: Yes, I always talk about it with the boys. Interviewer: But not with the girls? Xxxxxx: With the girls, no. (Xxxxxx: 71-72) I think there is a little bit of difference in talking to boys and girls, with your son or with your daughter […] because with the guys you talk like a friend and with your daughter you can’t. Like, I’m the father and I feel awkward with her [my daughter] and telling her those things. Her mother is a woman too and can be her friend so she can get close to her and talk to her more. She will explain everything better. (Xxxxx: 90-91) Fathers who spoke about contraceptives were well informed about the benefits of using condoms to protect against sexually transmitted infections including HIV/AIDS as well as unwanted pregnancy. However, none of the fathers mentioned any form of contraceptive other than condoms. Interviewer: Do you talk to girls and boys differently about this topic [sex] or about contraceptives and sexually transmitted infections? Or do you talk to you them the same way? Xxxxxxx: No, everything is equal because we all sit down and I tell them, I bring them in and tell them that at the clinics they give you condoms or if not, go buy them yourselves and please protect yourself, I tell them. (Xxxxxxx: 69-72) While the majority of the men identified as Catholic, very few said that they regularly attended church. Almost all of the men said that sex was something that could be discussed within the Church, but that it was not spoken of now. Most of the men agreed that while sex could and should be discussed more openly in the Church, religion did not influence their own personal views about sex or how they talk about sex with their children. Interviewer: When you talk to your kids about sex or when you talk to them later about sex, how does religion affect the way you talk about sex? Xxxxxxx: It doesn’t. It doesn’t influence anything. (Xxxxxxx: 106-109)
Interviewer. What advice would you give to fathers who have children coming into adolescence? Xxxxxxx: If they [fathers] have the opportunity to study, they should study. Me, for example, I started high school again through Mil Solidarios after I was 28 years old. I was able to finish high school for free, the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me. (Xxxxxxx: 321-322) Interviewer: Is there anything else that we haven’t discussed that you would like to mention? Xxxxxxxxx: I always think that here in the community, in the Bañado Sur, people are so well organized. I’m telling you, I always hear about social organizations. For example, Mil Solidarios is absolutely wonderful. They are teaching kids how they have to be in life, they give them the opportunity to study and also form friendships between themselves. All of that. It’s a great organization. Here, for example, despite the fact that there are many problems due to drugs and all that, it’s going away little by little. I think Mil Solidarios is implementing this system of bringing kids to a better place. If this organization didn’t exist in this community, the Bañado Sur would be completely different already. It would be a lot more difficult because there are a lot of ugly things that exist here. (Xxxxxxxxx: 102-103) FBOs as an Intervention Site Mil Solidarios is a faith-based organization, but it is perceived to be somewhat different from other churches in the Bañado. Most participants’ attitudes and perceptions of the Church were positive, though many fathers said they did not attend church themselves. This study sought to understand if residents of the Bañado felt that FBOs to serve as an intervention site for workshops, lectures, and educational sessions to be held on risky behaviors. Some men said that the Church would seldom speak on issues such as community violence, partner violence, juvenile violence, and substance abuse. However, sex was a topic that fathers never said was discussed in church. At the same time, the majority of fathers thought that all of these issues could be discussed in the Church. Some men did disagree, saying that the Church was not an appropriate venue to discuss these issues, that the Church was a place for people to go, pray, listen to the sermon, and nothing more. Interviewer: Do you think that these topics are topics that they can discuss within a religious community? Xxxxxxx: Definitely, they definitely can. Why wouldn’t they be able to? Interviewer: Including sex, violen...
Interviewer. There is a lot, and when something arrives, we are at the tail of Oaxaca, and so nothing arrives. And so, we don’t have anything, we don’t have any leaflets, no brochures, no posters, no banners, before they used to send posters. This, thank God, is a flipchart is from ’95, ’96 yeah? They sent it to us, I grabbed, I laminated it, I saved it, because if not… I am working with these now, but they’re outdated. […] we feel a little bit removed because truthfully, I feel that we are forgotten, in other words, we do our job with what little we have […] with this structure it is difficult to work, yes. (ISSSTE 1, Oaxaca: 48) Institutional barriers were mentioned most frequently, and most passionately, at the ISSSTE in Oaxaca. Lack of space, time, and confidence in the system where they worked were apparent in interviews at this institution. For example, while lack of space was something that all institutions mentioned, only in Oaxaca was there a distinct lack of space as well as institutional support to provide more space. For example, at the ISSSTE in Mexico, providers described their facility as spacious, but said that it lacked organization to adequately use the space available for health promotion. In contrast, providers at the ISSSTE in Oaxaca described the space available to them as cramped and inadequate to provide services to their patients. One said that she felt like the facility was the forgotten corner of Mexico, and another stated that the facility wouldn’t approve funds to place a curtain in her area of work to provide privacy for women receiving Pap smears. They also noted more “modern” methods of contraception such as implants, IUDs, and emergency contraceptives had not made it to their area yet.
Interviewer. Why do you think some women in your community may choose not to feed this way? Xxxxx: Breastfeeding? Interviewer: Or exclusive for six months. Xxxxx: Well, for me, women who don’t breastfeed their children don’t do it because they are lazy. Because they do not like sitting there with their child for half an hour, because it's boring, right, half an hour with the child until he doesn’t want anymore. That's why they give them formula. There was less consensus around the introduction of foods and other substances within the Villa Xxxxxxxxx community. Women discussed introducing substances like “frescos,” fresh juices believed to refresh the infant’s stomach, and water in the first two months of the infant’s life. This varied greatly with some mothers starting as early as the day the infant was born to three months. The introduction of foods including soups, chicken, beans, and rice also varied but usually took place around the third and fourth month. The most prominent pattern to arise from this data was that the four mothers who specifically referred to financial hardship such as not having sufficient funds to pay for everyday needs or having to skip meals because of not being able to afford food discussed the introduction of different substances and traditional remedies like herbs, oregano, and lemongrass. Another participant talked about introducing chamomile and “agua gata,” a thin mix of cornmeal and sugar, when her infant was two days old. Xxxxxxx: We call it ... my mom calls it agua gata (“cat water”). When people don’t have a way to buy milk, when they don’t have anything. That happened with my sister. It also happened with my first child, I did not have milk. I would mix cornmeal with sugar, and he would drink it ... but he was used to drinking it with milk. There was one exception among the four women who discussed financial hardships; one woman who exclusively breastfed cited economic hardship as the main motivator. Family and Partner Support Partner Support When participants were asked if their partners supported them during breastfeeding, 11 of the participants discussed feeling supported in different ways. Five of these 11 participants said that their partners advised them to breastfeed. The partners’ advice varied with some partners telling the mothers the benefits of breastfeeding and others instructing mother to breastfeed the baby when the child cried. Three of the participants that felt supported by their partners mentioned that he gave t...
